Tuesday, 9 November 2010

OMG: My encounter with a booger! TF2...

It's not often I come across cheating arse-wipes in games.

Cheats and hax are something that happens to other people and because 90% of my multiplayer experiences are against/co-op with people I know when it does happen it sticks and it stings.

A few years ago we were huge TF2 players, the clan was in full swing and we had at least 8 active players and played every night. It was before all of the unlockables and it was simple, straightforward and awesome because of it. But on a typical night where we would attempt to get a game going against random members of the TF2 public someone joined our server, someone who I would hate for the next two years. His name was g00berLikesMen.

In the twisted weave of my memory the arrival of this entity has a dark tint, a shadow that passes over the landscape of Dustbowl (part 3) as I run eagerly out from the attacking spawn room to see a sniper stood proudly on the first capture point.


A 10 second wait until I respawn. Kello (our server admin) has not yet set insta-spawn and I seethe at how quickly I, a practiced TF2 veteran, was taken down so quickly and easily. My team mate Chris was his usual unsympathetic self and the standard "har har, n00b" sounded clearly over teamspeak.

Soon though I was back on my feet and ready to take on the fluky sniper once again. This time I decided I would simply wait in hiding until my extremely helpful team mate had shown his face so I was less likely to be picked off straight away. I ran out from my hiding place as soon as I thought I would be safe but, as you may have guessed;


Another headshot and immediate death for Andy. Yes it's less painful if I describe myself in the third person in this story.

Right, I thought, the goal is no longer to capture the point but to show this guy up and attempt to regain what little confidence I had in my playing abilities. I chose to play as a spy next and, moving to another position activated my cloaking device and ran out to hide behind him to

*Boom* *Bang*

When I was cloaked? No, no no this just won't do so I decide to bravely confront the user known as g00berLikesMen over the medium of in game text-chat.

"How on earth did you know I was there?" I politely asked, trying to allow for the slight possibility that it was a mixture of tactics and experience. Unfortunately the reply hinted at neither of these:

"Lulz, Sk1llz!1" I sighed inwardly at the sight of that message and knew exactly what it meant, we had one of those dirty little cheats on the server and without admin powers there wasn't much I could do about it.

After a few seconds of thought however I realised that although he could probably see where I was all of the time, it took him two shots to finish me off last time. That probably meant he didn't have some kind of auto-aim cheat and that meant he could be defeated and humiliated.

That's the great thing about Team Fortress 2, it's kind of like Rock Paper Scissors, there's always a class that can beat another class depending on the tactics used by either player. And to cut a long story short I decided the best bet for attacking a sniper who could see through walls and cloaks was the fastest class in the game, the scout!

To cut a long story short he died, he disconnected from the server and we never saw him again. So here's the moral of my story guys.

Cheaters are not the worst players because they break the rules. Cheaters are the worst players because they only have one tactic. If you can find a way to beat them within the rules then they'll more than likely leave and go to another server where they haven't wised up.

And please, lets have less snipers out there (any excuse to play this eh?)

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